Confusion averted: praise jeebus.

Narrator: Most days of the year are unremarkable. They begin, and they end, with no lasting memories made in between. Most days have no impact on the course of a life. May 23rd was a Wednesday.- 500 days of Summer

I had 4 people respond, and now I feel much better and no longer confused. :D

In my midnight confessions- When I say all the things that I want to

"Please let me get what I want" - She and Him

I really don't feel like this is too much to ask for. I really, really don't.
All my friends- read the previous post, and follow it, please. I really can handle it- I don't need anything else.

Can I get something off my chest?

All I want in life is honesty. I want the people around me and in my life to be honest with me above all else. That's all I need.

If someone doesn't want to be friends with me, that's fine.
If someone doesn't like me, that's okay. I can handle it.
Just tell me what the deal is, so I know how to feel and act.

Don't tell me you want to remain friends and stay in contact if you don't. Don't text me, and then never respond when I try to talk to you back. I hate feeling confused, and at 22 years old, I'm over the confusion. I want low key, casual, no drama, confusion free friendship. This goes for both guys and girls, new friends and old.
As friends, if you no longer want to talk to me, just tell me. As interactions with guys, if it was only physical, that's fine- it is what it is. Just let me know, so I don't feel like I can talk to you as a friend.

The weather outside is frightful...

It is a windy, cold, blustery day in Atlanta, and it is no fun. It went from 73 degrees over the weekend, and now it's 42 degrees and raining. Not fair, Atlanta, not fair. It's supposed to be like this all week too. I think that means I'll be spending the week burrowed up in my blankie watching tv :D

I just want to ride bikes with you.

“Just because I don’t say anything doesn't mean I don’t like you. I opened my mouth, I tried. And besides you're probably holding hands with some skinny, pretty girl that likes to talk about bands and all I wanna do is ride bikes with you. And stay up late and watch cartoons. I'm just your average Thundercats ho.” – Nothing Came Out by The Moldy Peaches

It is such a beautiful day

It is 65 degrees outside, the sun is shining, everything's turning green again, and I am in a fantastic mood. I spent the entire afternoon with Kip playing with someone else's kids in Centennial Olympic Park, watching the fountain show, and finding the brick with his name on it. Then we picked up Carter and went to Tin Lizzies for dinner, and it was AMAZING. I loved my meal sooo much. I wanted to explore the Oakland Cemetery after dark, but the gates were closed. So we went to Inserection instead, and spent about an hour being awkward and making fun of the pornos.

I am so excited for spring to get here, because it's one season closer to me graduating. And it means swimming pools, lifeguarding, tans, and gorgeous days.
I feel like I am in a really good place in my life right now- I'm doing well in school, I have a great support system of friends who love me, and I am looking forward to what life has to offer.

I have changed so much in the past few years- I'm more independent, confident, knowledgeable in my field, understanding, patient, and loyal. I love who I am becoming.

I'm single for the first time in 6 1/2 years, and it's been so refreshing and freeing. For the first time in a long time, I feel excited about meeting people, and for the first time in the last three years, I feel attractive and confident in myself. And I know that's only going to get better as I keep exercising and losing my freshman 15. I got a brand new haircut this week, which has made me feel even better about myself.

I am loving life right now, and love that I have fabulous friends to share it with.

I am a sexy babe.

I LOVE my new hair cut. Just so everyone knows.

I want so much more than they have planned...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DeDPySP4nIw


"I want adventure in the great wide somewhere
I want it more then I can tell
and for once it might be grand
to have someone understand
I want so much more then they've got planned"

Thank you Belle, for completely summing me up. Belle is strong-willed, independent, and intelligent, and I'd like to think I am too. She wants freedom, and adventure, and the opportunity to choose her own fate.

I am getting so excited for graduation, even though it's not until December. I chose my major for this very reason- I can go absolutely (literally) anywhere. I can go into the Peace Corps, or Americorps, do field studies or ethnographies all over the world, be involved in any museum, any Cultural Resource Management Project, or discover a new civilization (in my fedora) ... I get my adventure.

Just 9 months until I get to join the real world, and I couldn't be more ready. I am saving up my money, looking at Grad schools and Jobs (whichever makes more sense once I'm out of school), and cities I want to possibly live in (Seattle, NYC, Denver...). I'm hoping to either get into a Museology program, or work somewhere like the American Museum of Natural History in Manhattan (they're hiring right now- dammit!).

And to top off all of this fabulousness, I'm single, which I'm actually enjoying. I thought being single, and living alone would be absolutely horrible, but I am loving it. I had a fantastic weekend hanging out with a great guy, and if Jeff was here, I would have missed out on that. I can do what I want, when I want, without listening to anyone being jealous or whining. It's so...freeing.
Maybe the past is like an anchor holding us back. Maybe, you have to let go of who you were to become who you will be. :D

Don't trust a ho...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdB3Oyd5HtU&feature=fvst

You know what? I don't believe what that person sent me. Absolutely not a credible source. I'm going to go with my gut feeling, and say he's a great guy, who I'd love to be friends (and more if wanted) with.

So pretty, so smart- such a waste of young heart

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBSR_hwKXAM

"I hear you're living out of state, running in a whole new scene
I'm a satellite heart- lost in the dark"

Today kind of sucked, I'm not going to lie. Spanish exam went well I think, *cross your fingers*, and I got to go to lunch with my parents before they went back to Ohio. So far, so good right?

Now, I don't have feelings (crush sure, seriousness- no) for this guy from this week, but coming home to a message telling me how much of a player said guy is kind of puts a damper on the kick ass mood I was in over the weekend. I haven't told anyone any details other than Rachael and Elyse- this person just knew I like this guy and felt the need to warn me. I don't mind casualness- but I would like honesty if that's all it was.I don't want to have a relationship, especially not a long distance one. I want to be young and have fun, and experience life. I don't mind having a good time. I just need to know if that's all it was- because I had a great time. I just want to know if I need to not think about how much I enjoyed being with him/go get tested (ack!). Any thoughts?

Here's an excerpt of what I received:

"i don't want to like shoot your dreams down and such, but like i know hes the kinda guy that hides the fact that he will sleep with random people for one night, so I hope you used protection."

"he's the kind of person that uses his good looks and charm to womanize someone."

"i just don't want to see him use you you know? i mean its real easy to tell a girl shes hot gorgeous and beautiful, fuck the brains out of her so she likes it, and pay for dinner once or twice, so she'll invite you over again.what you think preston did over and over? convinced girls that he was really into them. its just the things i know and heard about him."

Happy St. Valentines Day- even if it's a hallmark holiday

Roses are red, violets are blue... Fuck you, whore!

Not seriously, but I am in love with this movie right now, and since it's almost valentines day, I assumed it was appropriate.

So, I don't care about valentines. So lets watch a fun clip, that make me smile!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2seAJsrtIbQ

What a week it's been

“For Tom Hansen, this was the night where everything changed. That wall Summer so often hid behind - the wall of distance, of space, of casual - that wall was slowly coming down. For here was Tom, in her world... a place few had been invited to see with their own eyes. And here was Summer, wanting him there. Him, no one else.” – (500) Days of Summer

I am happy right now, for reasons I won't enumerate here, but it's an incredible feeling. This has been one of the best weekends that I can remember. It's nice being happy, feeling attractive, and enjoying being with someone. I'll say it- I have a little crush :D

You're like an indian summer in the middle of winter

Every morning when my cats wake me up, I wonder if they're telling me that today couldn't possibly be any worse than yesterday, and that life will get better. They're probably just telling me that they're hungry and want some food.
I'm feeling better, but then I realize that there are still over 10 months left until I graduate.
I want a job to fill some of the hours of the day, and I can't find one. I need the money, badly. I want to graduate, and move on and start my life.

Cherokee people, Cherokee tribe..

I am so tired of having to defend my heritage to people who have no business questioning my ethnic background. When one of your good friends tells you that "You're as Indian as I am black (he's VERY white)", and calls you "sitting whitechick", it's offensive. I have flat out told him multiple times that I am on the tribal register, I have my tribal papers, I have been attending pow wows my entire life, I have grandparents on each side of my family that were full blood Cherokee, and I received a scholarship because of my heritage. And he just couldn't care less. In his eyes, I will always be completely Caucasian, and since I identify as Cherokee American, that really bothers me. Don't question my background. Don't accuse me of lying. I am very VERY proud of my heritage, and that's the way its going to be. The whole reason I entered Anthropology in the first place is because of my ethnic background, and I look forward to working as an anthropologist with the Cherokee nations.

I am so excited about my future

This is my last spring semester of my undergraduate degree, and I am starting to think about my future. I know that I am not going directly into graduate school, and plan to take at least 9 months (spring and summer) off of school. I'm not sure what my masters will be in. I'm looking at my choices between museum studies, anthropology, cherokee studies, and historic preservation. I don't know what major woud be best for what I want to do. I think I want to work in a museum setting, but I'm not 100% sure. I'd also be interested in working with the national register of historic places, or as an anthropologist working with the Cherokee indians.
How do you know what you're meant to do, and what's best for your future? Here are some of the schools I am looking at, and yes, I know I need to narrow it down some more. :D

University of Washington:


University of Kansas:


University of Colorado Boulder:


Colorado State University:


Arizona State University:


University of Michigan:


Ohio State:


Other Schools I am interested in: Western Carolina, University of North Carolina, and University of Connecticut.

Thank goodness for these kittens.

They make excellent lap warmers.

I get by with a little help from my friends

I had so much fun with Elysiepiecie during our Twilight Party :D I am so lucky to have met such amazing people here in Atlanta. I don't know what I would do without friends like her.

It's my birth month!

I turn 22 this month, and for the first time in my life, I'm really not all that excited. There's no big milestone this year, no boyfriend to celebrate with, no huge party. I'm not sure what to think about where I am in my life. I'm not where I thought I would be, but I'm working on it. By the time I'm 23, I want to be in graduate school or in a well paying anthropology job. I want to either be renting a decent place, or be making payments on a home of my own. I want to be self supportive. And I'd love to have a dog :D